


'Dog' of the Military

by GrandNinjaMasterRen



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
Genre: AU All Alchemists Are Animals, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cats, Dogs, Edward Elric Is A Little Shit, Gen, Minor Character Death, Non-Chronological, Paternal Roy Mustang
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-16
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:42:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22745737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrandNinjaMasterRen/pseuds/GrandNinjaMasterRen
Summary: Roy is a good dog. Mistress Riza trained him well. The pup is disobedient, and the cat is really too much to bear. Out-of-order one-shots in the lives of Roy the German Shepherd, Ed the Pomeranian, Al the British Shorthair, and Riza the Human.
Kudos: 29





	1. Play Fight

Finally, it was time. Mistress Riza was out and the bastard was napping. Damn slacker. Ed crept closer to the lazy bastard. He readied himself to pounce.

"Don't even think about it, Edward." Roy said without opening his eyes. Ed growled.

"Don't tell me what to do!" Ed yapped, pouncing on the older dog. Ed bit at Roy's neck, but Roy's thick fur protected his throat. Roy sat up. Ed slid down his back.

"Cut it out." Roy barked. Ed bit Roy's tail. Roy yelped, turned around and grabbed Ed's collar in his teeth. He gave the pup a hard shake.

Ed slipped out of his collar and ran around the furniture, dodging Roy. Roy's paws scrabbled for purchase on the slick linoleum. Roy went skidding into the side table, knocking it over towards Ed.

Mistress Riza's favorite vase shattered against the floor. Water, flowers, and pottery shards flew everywhere. A shard flew past the cowering Ed, cutting his nose. Water seeped into his long fur.

Roy picked himself up gingerly. He carefully padded over to Ed and picked the pup up by the scruff of his neck. Roy carried him into Mistress Riza's room, to the large dog bed, and plopped the pup onto the bed.

"Stay." Roy said, "Mistress Riza won't be happy." Ed curled into a ball, whimpering. Roy sat next to the bed to make sure Ed wouldn't get in any more trouble than he already was.

* * *

When Riza got home from the supermarket, she wasn't immediately greeted by her dogs. Walking into the living room, she let out a cry as she noticed the pieces of her vase in a puddle of water, flowers scattered around. The end table was laying on its side and the wood was chipped.

Riza set her groceries down in the kitchen, beginning to panic. Her normally loud, mismatched pair of hounds was nowhere to be found. Riza prayed that both were okay.

She found them in their doggy bed, Roy curled up around Ed, who was fast asleep. Riza stepped fully into the room, and Roy's dark eyes met hers. Roy had been keeping watch over Ed. How cute.

"Good dog." She said quietly. She smiled.


	2. Dogsitter part 1

Riza was anxious. She was going to visit her friend Rebecca tomorrow and would be staying with her for the night. Roy regarded her with a tilted head. She glanced guiltily at her suitcase. Roy padded away and returned with one of her sneakers in his mouth. He set it by her feet.

"Aww. Are you trying to help me pack, Roy?" Riza asked her dog.

Suddenly, the door to her room went flying open. Ed skidded in. He saw the suitcase and began yapping at Riza. Roy barked twice and Ed quieted. He slunk away, tail between his legs.

* * *

Ed saw Roy carrying Mistress Riza's sneaker to her room. The door was mostly closed, so Ed took a few steps back and got a running start to slam into the door. His paws slipped out from under him. When Ed regained his footing, he noticed _**the case**_.

"Mistress Riza, don't leave! I'll be a good dog, I promise! Please, don't leave!" Ed yapped.

"Be quiet, Edward." Roy barked. The bastard was just going to _**let**_ Mistress Riza _**leave**_ them? Ed tucked his tail between his legs as he slunk out of the room.

* * *

Maes had shown up earlier than expected. Riza sat through his obligatory gushing about his daughter. Maes got suddenly serious.

"What's this I hear about a new dog, Riza?" Riza sighed.

"Ed is a troublemaker. He might try to start something with Roy, but he's usually pretty good. Don't patronize him; he's 'not' a lap dog." Maes laughed.

"That's adorable, but you should have stuck with just Roy." Riza's eyes flashed dangerously. Maes held up a hand.

"Roy requires special care and so do puppies."

"Well then. I hope you can handle them." Riza replied haughtily. She left.

Maes sighed. Getting up to go put his stuff in the spare bedroom, he caught sight of a golden puff wedged between the edge of the doorway and the door to the spare bedroom.

"So, this is Ed, huh?" Maes said looking at the puppy.

* * *

Upon hearing his name, Ed glanced up. The man was looking at him. Ed tried pawing at his long fur to get it out of the crack without pulling the hair out of his coat. The human's hand gently tugged Ed's fur free. The man said something, but Ed didn't care. Mistress Riza had _**left**_ him with this man. Did she not want him because he'd been a bad dog? The man picked Ed up and Ed squirmed trying to get free. The man held Ed up in front of his face, which made Ed writhe even more.

* * *

Maes smiled at the tiny Pomeranian.

"Oh! You are so cute! My little Elicia would love you!" Maes squished the puppy to his chest. Ed scrabbled his paws across the man's chest. Maes got the hint and set the puppy down. Ed scrambled away.


	3. Glory Hound Part 1

Riza fought against the leashes in her hand as she brush her bangs out of her face with the same hand that held her coffee. She tugged her eager pair of hounds back. The normally well behaved Roy was practically _strutting_ down the sidewalk, seemingly ignorant of the girls cooing over him. Edward, on the other hand, was keenly aware of the attention.

"Puppy!" A pigtailed girl squealed. She ran up to Edward and began to pet the Pomeranian.

* * *

Ed yapped playfully at the girl-child stroking him adoringly. Roy paced back to Ed and Mistress Riza, sitting down at her feet.

"Edward." Roy barked, annoyed. Ed pointedly ignored the bastard. He put his paws up on the girl-child's overalls. The girl-child shrieked with delight. Ed licked the girl-child's hands and face. Mistress Riza laughed.

" **Edward**!" Roy snarled. The child whimpered.

* * *

Nina backed away from the mean, scary dog.

She tripped over the curb and stumbled back.

Someone _screamed_.

Nina heard howling and barking.

Something impacted her body.


End file.
